PEACE IN THE STORM🙏🏾💕🥰

  

We all yearn and strive for peace in our lives, maintaining a sense of peace and composure during our difficult and chaotic situations. No matter what situation I find myself and no matter what storm I’m currently facing in my life, I will always be still knowing that Jesus is there with me as He was there with His disciples in the boat. God has always been orchestrating my peace through my challenges.

 

In my short life, I have faced challenge after challenge but in the midst of it all I had and still have peace. The peace that I have scares me sometimes but God promised us peace that surpasses all understanding. Through all my trials and turbulations I believe God had and still has a purpose by allowing me to walk through everything I went through and still gave me peace. My voice was once buried in silence, hidden behind manipulation, abuse, and pain. I was pushed into this hole of darkness that was lonely, miserable, mad, bitter and angry. I didn’t recognise who I was anymore, I lost myself and lived in the shadow of who and what I was made to believe I was, my soul was ripped apart with each passing day. Sometimes God calls you to the seed of suffering not to break you but to birth a glory you’ve never seen before, I believe it’s part of the journey, MY JOURNEY! I believe God didn’t call me to this journey to break me; He called me to birth a purpose greater than I could have imagined, to use me to heal and empower other women through my experience and pain. Throughout my marriage and my struggles, I learned one critical truth: You can’t make people do right by you, but you can decide how long you let them do you wrong!  And let’s be honest, sometimes we drag out the suffering way longer than necessary, hoping things will magically change well the sad truth and reality is that 90% of the time, the don’t change. I learned through my journey and experience that the lessons I allowed myself to learn was because I cried out to the Lord and He gave me peace🙏🏽💕

 

You always blame yourself even though you showed up with sincerity, with openness and courage to be vulnerable. You give your all, your time and heart in hopes of building an honest and real relationship but you are never enough, or you are just too much for the other person to handle. In my marriage I apologized without being at fault, I lowered my head when I was right, I did for my ex-husband what he could never do for me, I hid my feelings and even I lost count of the times I put my ex-husband’s happiness above my own. I voluntarily walked into an emotional escape room with no clues and a lot of locked doors. Instead of a fairy-tale ending, I found myself tangled in deceit, betrayal, hurt, and trauma. I lost myself completely, became a stranger to my own reflection, and lived in the shadow of what I was made to believe I was. This was a lesson to me that loving people harder doesn’t make them love you back. You know why? Because no one can ever value the person that is not meant to be in their life. I learned and made peace with the reality that I wasn’t enough for my ex-husband because I wasn’t the one for him, me showing up for him wasn’t enough, me loving him wasn’t enough, me going to war for him and sacrificing for him wasn’t enough because I was never the one and I could never be enough no matter how much I poured into his cup and that’s okay. It’s okay because I learned through my journey and experience that the lessons I allowed myself to learn was because I cried out to the Lord and He gave me peace🙏🏽💕

 

Through my healing process I got the affirmation and confirmation that I need to love myself more and be selfish sometimes to know not to ever again put myself in a position where I will have to fight for someone to see my worth. I wasted too much time trying to prove myself to a man who was too blind, too selfish and too broken to appreciate what I was bringing to the table, I will never again beg for a man to love me, chase after a man’s attention, nor convince a man that I am enough because I AM ENOUGH in fact I AM MORE THAN ENOUGH! And anyone who doesn’t see that, let me be clear THEY DON’T DESERVE ME! I’m done begging for the bare minimum; I don’t live there anymore! The healing journey came with a lot of peace because through my journey and experience, I cried out to the Lord and He gave peace🙏🏽💕

 

I learned - I learned to choose myself, loudly and unapologetically. To walk away from the bare minimum love, to stop chasing validation, and to never again beg for the attention I deserve. I now validate myself because the only validation I need is from the Lord and me! I NOW TELL MYSELF EACH PASSING DAY THAT: “DIPSY YOU ARE ENOUGH, MORE THAN ENOUGH!And anyone who doesn’t see that? Well, let’s just say, they don’t deserve a seat at my table anymore because I’m all about peace and love now🙏🏽💕 

 

My soul took hit after hit until one day, I stood tall and said enough is enough, I’m not a victim and the God I serve enabled me to break through the abuse and strengthened me to develop resilience and resistance. I decided I’m not going to be a victim of my past circumstances because I am a warrior with a record of victory, I have the power to change my life and I am what I choose to become because I was meant to shine and most definitely taking control and action towards the life I want! I refuse to let my past get in the way of my destiny for I know I am destined for greatness for sure. I’m giving all the honour, the glory and the praise to God Almighty because here I stand today no longer silent, but loud and proud! And this time, it’s not just for me; it’s for every woman who has ever felt voiceless because despite everything, I WALKED OUT NOT BROKEN BUT A QUEEN👑 

 

My journey continues and I strive to move towards a happier and more fulfilling life🥂💃🏽🥰 I’m Just A Small Girl With A Big God🙏🏽💕 Mercy Rewrote My Life🙏🏽💕Grace Has Located Me🙏🏽💕 I Am An Overcomer🙏🏾💕A Very Beautiful Story❤️ Live in the moment, Laugh harder, Love deeply & Celebrate more💕🎉🥂💃🏽🥰

 

 

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus - Philippians 4:6-7 🙏🏽🙏🏽

 

Love & Light

Dipsy💚